Advice on Divorce
Divorce counseling advice
Divorce is as traumatic as it can be confusing. You are flooded with too many emotions to think calmly and resolve the tangles on your own. Divorce counseling helps you to understand the causes of separation and come to terms with changes that divorce brings upon. You are too emotionally battered to think about your mental and social growth. Divorce counseling will take you step-by-step through your emotions and problems to overcome.
∑ Need for divorce counseling
1. Women in India are emotional by character and tend to seek comfort in any form available. They tend to recall incidences from their perspective too often and ignore the other side. Divorce counseling offers a third angle to the whole idea, enabling the truth to sink in and accept your mistakes and forgive the other spouse.
2. For men in India, counseling means that they are emotionally weak. However, it only means you are not clear enough to understand rationally the thought process and make distinct decisions. They tend to store their emotions inside and become rigid over time. Counseling helps them to express and vent the emotions in acceptable ways.
3. Both the parties need to understand the role of family in their support system. Often Indian families blindly support their child and accuse other partner for everything. Divorce counseling allows people to clearly realize their part in the failed marriage so that they wonít repeat the same mistakes again.
4. Also, divorce counseling can put you in better shape to deal with your child empathetically. Divorce counselors can explain the situation to a child in less stressful way and resolve their concerned issues about their parentís divorce.
∑ Issues referred to in divorce counseling
1. Coping skills
The divorce counselor first deal with raw emotions which can plague a person immediately after a divorce. They not only assist in emotional healing and channeling their pain but also help in preserving patientís physical health. Coping skills involve stress release exercises, anger management, processes for balancing life and asking for help.
2. Communication skills
After divorce, confidence level of divorced people is shaken, especially of Indian women. Communication skill training during divorce counseling helps them to regain their self-belief in expressing their thoughts and needs. Moreover, it helps them to interpret messages in a way they were intended, irrespective of their emotions. This helps in dealing with societal remarks and sometimes family pressures.
3. Relationship coaching
Divorce counseling also helps relieve your doubts about your ability to maintain a relationship. Indians are often scared of bonding again because of insecurity and loss of confidence. Though men are married easily again, sometimes under family pressure, they never learn the dynamics of relationships. However, counselor re-instills your belief in you and helps you move on in another relationship by bringing about your body language and expressions.
4. Personal coaching
It helps in identifying what you need from your new life and helps you in achieving your goals. This type of divorce counseling is a great help for people who are setting up new careers or new home in different city. Non-working women in India are greatly helped by understanding the new domain of work.
∑ Tips for divorce counseling
1. All the involved parties in a divorce must be willing to take the divorce counseling in right spirit. They should have an open and receiving mind to take maximum benefit of divorce counseling.
2. Divorced couple should be patient and co-operative to counselor. Often frustrated, people quit too soon to understand its effect. Counselor knows best how to proceed.
3. Always be completely honest with your counselor. You donít have to impress your counselor and neither you should be ashamed of your situation. You should understand that the emotions you are dealing with are common for all divorced people.